On April 11th this year my Mum would have been 88 years old. There are lots of women who live to be this age nowadays, but for Patricia Catherine Jones (nee Bryant), her life was to end at a mere 71 having suffered for 6 years with Alzheimers.
So, in a very real sense, we lost her twice, Dad, Nina and I. She was lost to us when she ceased to comprehend who we were and then again when she slipped away, hopefully to regain full self consciousness in the next world.
Nevertheless, it was hard to bear for all of us and there is rarely a day goes by that she is not far from our thoughts. Just before she died I wrote a poem to her, for her, but of course she never read it in this life. I like to think that she looked over my shoulder in the next one and read it then. Here it is, for me really, to tell whoever reads this, how much she meant to me...
My Mother
(born 11th April 1921 – died 4th January 1993)
Shining light that shone so bright
To illuminate my world,
A beacon in my darkest hours
When my weaknesses unfurled.
You gave me Love when Love was lost
And Hope when there was none,
You helped me look beyond myself
Gave me the Will to carry on.
You made me laugh when I would cry
And to think when I would not.
You always sought the truth from me
And you knew when I would lie.
Sometimes you made me feel ashamed
Of the things I’d done or said
Yet always you were there for me
To show the way ahead
And lead me from my waywardness.
You shared my Hopes and Dreams and Fears,
You cooked and cleaned and washed my clothes
And dried away my tears.
You stood by me when I let you down,
As I was prone to do
And forgave me for my churlishness
When I was rude to you.
You gave yourself to me and mine
And helped us on our way,
I know my wife is grateful
For that week you came to stay
So long ago when we were young
And felt we couldn’t cope
With a new born babe’s demands on us,
But in fact you gave us Hope,
By doing what you did so well.
So thankful am I that I had You,
I would not have wished for any other
Person in this world than You,
To have as my Friend and Confidante,
To Love and call “My Mother”.
